2. I AM CURRENTLY THINKING:
 COCKS
 WANGS
 DONGS
 BONGHITS
 DICKS

3. AROUND MY FRIENDS I AM CONSIDERED:
 THE COCKSUCKER
 THE LEADER
 THE VIOLENT ONE
 THE SARCASTIC ONE
 THE SCAB

4. IN MY BASEMENT I HAVE:
 HALF OF A PROSTITUTE
 TANGLED EXTENTION CORDS
 THE OTHER HALF OF THE PROSTITUTE
 MY BONG COLLECTION
 A LIZARD SQUISHED BETWEEN TWO PIECES OF PLYWOOD

5. I LIKE TO READ:
 COMICS
 WALL STREET JOURNAL
 USENET
 PORN
 SLASHDOT

6. I KNOW:
 PERL
 E-COMMERCE
 ESPERANTO
 DICKS
 YOU HAVE A BIG FAT ASS

7. I ASPIRE TO:
 LICK ALL THE UNLICKED DICKS
 GO TO THE MOON
 RAPE PANTS (AGAIN)
 ACHIEVE UNIX GURU STATUS
 TO BE JIZZWORTHY